Be Patient....& Not Know....

I saw this on my friend Eboni's FB page and it was right on time so I felt that I HAD to pass it on.......

Nothing is exciting if you know what the outcome is going to be. You keep wanting to know how things will play out, keep asking to see the future. God doesn't give anyone the power to know the future, because life becomes maddeningly boring when you know everything upfront. So, instead of struggling, enjoy the uncertainty - to be alive means to not know.

sincerely yours,

nic

my 2cents...

after watching the 20/20 special on rihanna, i have a new found respect for her. she made a lot of valid points and seemed very sincere. despite what people are saying like she set this up to promote her album...whatever. that's ignorance.

during the interview she said that, "you don't stop loving someone just like that." and i agree. you can't turn it on and off. however, you can leave a situation before it gets worse. staying only makes it ok for the abuse to happen again.

although i have never been in a physically abusive relationship, i have been in a relationship where i was emotionally abused and i know others who have as well. abuse is abuse in my opinion; it leaves you with scars regardless. to me, being in an emotional abusive relationship is tricky because its like no one can really see your scars unless you let them. so theres room to hide it and act as if things are ok. which makes it easier for you to convince yourself that things will get better or that he won't say or do something like that again to hurt you. where as in a physically abusive situation, the scars are on the surface. make up and cover up's can only hide so much.

its just sad that women and young women have to go thru situations. its unfortunate because it is so easy to get caught up and fall "in love" that pretty soon, you're in too deep. i think that in order to get out of those situations and in order to heal, you have to realize that you have to love yourself. because if you don't, no one else will. period. realize that you are worth more than a broken promise/or a broken arm. its not worth it and that is NOT real love. most of the time, its lust that tricks us into thinking its love.

i know we hear about abuse and read about it all the time but i think when it happens to celebs and those who we see as "invincible" or "untouchable", it makes us realize that they're humans too. and that unfortunately, no one is exempt from pain or heartache. the way we deal with it is what matters....because when you do get to that point where you know better and you see & believe what love is and what its not, you begin to live...

remember, "no one is gonna love you like you love yourself..." -niecy nash

sincerely yours,

nic

straight to the point....

the whole idea of people coming in to your life for a reason and a season has been weighing heavy on my heart for weeks now. i opened up the pages of the latest issue of essence magazine and i read the last page, t.d. jakes' words from his, get lifted, section of the magazine. it hit me when i read this. its something i already knew but it was reassurance that what i felt/thought all along was right....i believe others should take heed....

"...not everyone who comes into our lives means us well. that is why we must continuously be careful about whom we entertain. if it turns out that you must say good-bye to someone you care about, send them on their way with love, knowing that you shared a nourishing meal together in a divine season of your life..."

-t.d. jakes

sincerely yours,

nic

Good Hair...???

ok so i've seen the movie, good hair, and i've also read the latest essence article about famous women and their hair issues. one of the things that intrigued me to see the movie was when i saw solange knowles on oprah (with chris rock). she discussed her recent hair change (long to now having an extremely short cut) and it touched me. she said after she cut her hair, "she felt liberated". i know the feeling. its like something has been lifted off of you when you cut your hair. she also said she "wanted to show that you can still be beautiful even with short hair". which is also very true. some women fear men won't like it if they cut their hair. well newsflash; if he likes you for your hair, he's liking you for the wrong reasons! its hair...it can grow back. that's what i don't think people understand. nothing is permanent these days...especially when it comes to hair.

i've discussed this topic with a family and a few friends and i have come to a conclusion. the beauty of having the CHOICE weather to perm your hair or wear it natural or wear it long, short or WHATEVER is having good hair.

when i was younger, my mother never let me say good or bad hair. hair was hair and as long as it was healthy and looked nice, it was good. lol. now that i am older and i am responsible for my own hair, i have done a few things. my freshman year of college, i decided to wear braids for a while because i was playing soccer and i just never had time to go get my relaxer done by someone i trusted. eventually i let some people on campus do my hair and whatnot but i wasn't satisfied. eventually i decided to just go natural and i ended up natural and loved it for 2 great years. no perm...NOTHING. i rocked my braids, i straightened it from time to time...i loved it. it was healthy and grew a lot!

but i got restless, lol. i wanted a change soooo, i went back to a perm and chopped it off and i LOVE it. you see, a lot of ppl asked why i permed it and why i didn't just wear braids. but my response was, "i wanted a change...if i wanna go back to natural, i can." that to me was wonderful and like i said, that's the beauty of having good hair.

some of my friends say they prefer a perm because it makes the hair look better and it's more professional. and some say natural hair is better because its more healthy without all those products. truth be told, your hair can be healthy with a perm. it all depends on the stylist, the perm, and the maintenance. its hard work to up keep both natural and permed hair...its all in what you feel fits you.

also, i've found that most young women go with the trends. if long hair is in, that's what they're wearing. if short hair is the new fad, that's what they're rockin'. i wear short hair now and i love it. it's easy to maintain and despite what some may think, there are versatile styles. in my opinion, a woman that can rock a short hairstyle and a woman that can rock a natural hair style is a bad chick. it takes a certain person to be comfortable enough to do both...not that you aren't confident when you have hair. but when you have hair, to me, it seems like you have something to hide behind. with short hair, you can't hide behind much....that's confidence.

its funny because although i am wearing my hair short, and i'm thinking about getting a braided style friday. lol...i know. fickle huh?? lol! well call it what you want. i love the freedom of choice and i love being able to change it up anytime i want. i am comfortable with it and it makes me who i am. i think that's the most important thing. as long as you are comfortable with your hair, or yourself in general, DO YOU!. BE YOU! perm, natural, bald....whatever. it is what it is...just rock it and make i work!!! :-)

sincerely yours,

nic

Weekend Recap; Maxwell, Boobies & Dinner ;-)

so this weekend was one of the best. i was SUPER excited that i got tickets to see one of my fav artists since like FOREVER...MAXWELL!!! i kid you not, his concert was probably one of the best i've been to. and i have been to a lot of concerts. his energy, his voice and just his presence was just awesome. and the fact that i went with my bff & cousin ash just made it that much better :-)

he sang some of my favs like, somethin' somethin', til' the cops come knockin' and OF COURSE, ascension (my all time fav). then he went into his new cd and killed it! each song came with a different background on the screen. i mean it just felt like i was being taken somewhere else. the ban was great also. i love when the band can play a cut during a song and you can still rock to the beat...mmmm!

but one of my fav things was the way maxwell danced and did splits like back to back! that brotha is agile and in shape ok?!?! lol...i mean i have never seen someone move like that at a LIVE show and still be able to pop back up and hit a high note. SMH! that brotha is smooth i tell u....smooth. THEN, the way he used words during the show was just incredible. i never knew words could have that much effect ;-)

all in all, the concert was wonderful and it ws worth every dime. although i missed chrisette (whom i have seen before and she's excellent) and missed a little bit of common, still the concert was the best.

i also did a 5 mile walk for breast cancer today (sunday) and to be honest, it wasn't that bad. it was a gorgeous day, i had great company and it was all for a good cause. now sure, my thighs are a lil tight and my calfs are now tightening BUT i am not complaining. lol...i still was able to make dinner for the fam so its all good. i was surprised i was able to muster up the energy to fix a whole meal. but i did.

this weekend was indeed wonderful...hope you all enjoyed yours as well. until next time, xoxoxo and be blessed!

sincerely yours,

nic

Mandatory...NOT an Option

i was on facebook yesterday just cruising a few of my friends pages and i happen to come across my homie Devon's page. by the way, devon is the one who put me onto blogging so BIG UPS TO YOU SIR!! :-)....anyway, a quote he posted caught my attention. it read, "...if you are getting or already received a college education and you are NOT mentoring a younger student, what purpose is your education serving?..."

ever since i read that quote, it has stuck with me. i started to take a look at how i was using my education and knowledge to help younger students. i realized that just because you are not apart of a big brother or big sister organization, doesn't mean you still can't help. it can be your younger sister, brother, cousin...a kid from your church. the point is, the younger generation NEEDS HELP and GUIDANCE. if you are capable and willing, do it. to me, helping isn't an option; its mandatory. if i can lend someone an ear, help with an issue, or homework, i'm there.

younger children today really do want to have that role model they can look up to but they don't always know how to go about asking for the help. so its up to us to be that positive influence in their lives. yes, there are children who have family support but that doesn't mean they don't need help either. in that case, its reinforcement. a word of encouragement or just that extra push...think about it....

sincerely yours,

nic

Intro...

ok, so i have taken on a few different interests within the past few months. since i've turned 23 (in aug) i have just really began to analyze a lot of things and for the first time, i can say without hesitation that i am happy...i am content and excited about life. i have fallen in love with life, love, fashion, and music all over again. and needless to say, i am ECSTATIC about it. i have a new outlook on all of those topics and i have created this blog as a way for me to vent, update, and just let you all know my feelings on all the topics. feel free to comment, suggest, criticize or whatever. its all love...no worries.

thanks for stopping by and thanks for embracing my thoughts.

sincerely yours,

nic